Step 1 Come as yourself—that works best

The first step towards your fun, sexy and safe summer: be exactly who you are! It doesn’t matter what you look like, what your gender is or who you’re attracted to. Everyone is unique! How boring would the Summer of Love be if everyone were the same?

Tips for being yourself

  • Remember that you’re not the only one who finds this difficult. Many young people feel insecure about themselves.
  • Realise that insecurity doesn’t mean you have to change. Sometimes you need a little courage to be yourself in a group.
  • Surround yourself with people who accept you as you are. People who make you feel supported, both online and offline.

Are you afraid of being bullied, excluded or even abused if you are yourself? Or are you already experiencing this? Then take a look at the help page! Do you know others who are going through this? Support them and let them know that help is available.

Step 2 Partying and flirting... How did that work again?

You could almost forget after such a long lockdown! There are many different ways to flirt. Because what someone likes is very personal. Not every attempt is successful right away. With these tips, you’ll be well prepared for a flirty, festive Summer of Love!

Important

  • Don’t like what someone else says or does? Say something about it! Agree with your friends that you’ll support each other in this.
  • Notice that the other person doesn’t like what you’re saying or doing? Then stop and ask whether they’re okay. What one person finds funny can feel threatening to another.
  • See a situation where it looks like someone is going too far? Ask then too whether everyone is okay.

Meet new people

How did that work again? It’s quite possible that you’re asking yourself this question after a long lockdown without nightlife. Then quickly go to the tips and chat away with new people this Summer of Love! Also useful if you still remember how it works!

Step 3 Sex without worries

Check this for worry-free sex

Use condoms to prevent STIs, and with contraception you are protected against an unplanned pregnancy. Read more about a Summer of Love with worry-free sex.

How to prevent an STI

Condoms protect you and your partner against possible STIs and unintended pregnancies. At least, if a penis is involved in the sex. So make sure you have them with you.

How to prevent pregnancy

Do you not want to become pregnant but do want to have sex that could result in pregnancy? Then contraception is a good idea.

Summer STI test

Shall we make STI testing just as normal this summer as coronavirus testing? Just as with coronavirus, you can carry an STI without noticing it. You may even have caught it before the lockdown. That’s why testing is important.

Step 4 Enjoy sex together

Sex is most enjoyable when you both have fun

Pain, boredom or things you don’t really want to do don’t belong in sex. That’s why it’s important to discover what gives you and your partner pleasure. Feel free to let your imagination run wild!

It may seem as though there is only one way to have sex. That’s nonsense! There is much more to discover than just intercourse.

  • Sex is more than a penis or sex toy in the vagina, mouth or anus. Discover other exciting forms of sex together with your partner.
  • Sex is not a performance and isn’t about ‘scoring’. If you think you ‘have to perform’ during sex, you’ll enjoy it much less. What a shame!
  • Don’t focus on what you look like, but on what you feel during sex. Pleasure is a wonderful feeling, not a ‘perfect picture’.

Discover what gives you pleasure

Kissing, caressing, making love… Whatever you do, the first check is: does it feel good? Do you enjoy it, does it turn you on? Then carry on. If it feels good, it’s okay. And if you don’t like the touching? Then there’s only one solution: say so, however difficult that may be.

Do you know what your partner likes? Sometimes you can notice, feel or see it. But sometimes you can’t. Are you unsure? Ask. That way, you can discover together how to have enjoyable sex with each other.

Pain does not belong in sex

Many girls feel pain when they are not aroused enough and a finger, penis or sex toy enters their vagina. The vulva is then not wet enough or the muscles around it are too tense. Boys experience pain when their foreskin is too tight or their glans is irritated. Can’t you have sex without pain? Your GP or a counsellor at Sense will certainly know a solution.

Porn is not real sex

In porn, you see things that you often don’t experience in your own sex life. Everyone is immediately aroused and ready for spectacular sex in the wildest positions. It’s fine to watch, but porn is an acted-out sexual fantasy that never becomes reality. Watch, enjoy and fantasise, but never compare your sex life with porn.

Step 5 Help

First aid for the Summer of Love

Are you entering a sexy Summer of Love well prepared? Even then, something can go wrong. The condom breaks, you forgot to take your contraceptive pill… Or the sex didn’t feel good for another reason. Fortunately, help and advice are available. Act quickly if you or the other person may be pregnant. Or if you have symptoms that resemble an STI! Don’t be ashamed; many young people—and adults—experience this. You’re not the only one having bad luck with sex!

Sense.info help and advice

How did that work again? It’s quite possible that you’re asking yourself this question after a long lockdown without nightlife. Then quickly go to the tips and chat away with new people this Summer of Love! Also useful if you still remember how it works!

GP

Did you know that you can also go to your GP with questions about sexuality, contraception, pregnancy and STIs? GPs are bound by professional confidentiality and will not share your conversation with anyone if you don’t want them to. GPs also carry out STI and pregnancy tests and provide other help with sexuality. You can also go to your GP’s practice for your mental health.

For more information: https://summeroflove.sense.inf...