Asking for help
The most important tip for children and young people who are being bullied is: talk about it! Afterwards, you will often feel much better: you are no longer alone and the other person can help you stop the bullying. But it can be nerve-racking to talk about it and ask for help when you are dealing with bullying. In the animation ‘Asking for help’, you will get tips that can help with this.
Below, the tips from the video are listed once more:
- Who do you want to talk to? On the page Who can I turn to?, read about who you can talk to.
- When will you do it? Choose a moment when that person has time. If you want to talk to a male or female teacher, for example, choose the end of the school day.
- It can help to first write down what you want to say. That way, you can refer to the note or let the other person read your letter. Only tell them what you really want to get off your chest, such as what happened, how you feel and what you are afraid of. You are in control of your story. Do you also want to ask something? Write that down in advance.
- Tell them only what you want to tell. Do you simply want to get your story off your chest? Then clearly say that the other person does not have to do anything (yet). Or agree that the other person will do something only if you have approved it. Write down how you want it to happen; that will make you feel stronger.
- Practise the conversation in front of the mirror or – if you dare – with someone else.
- If you find it nerve-racking, you can also take someone with you to the conversation, such as a friend.
Standing up for yourself
Besides asking for help, you can also stand up for yourself. But how do you do that? There are ways to make yourself stronger and to let the other person know that you do not like what they are doing. In the animation ‘Standing up for yourself’, you will get tips on how to do this.
Below, the tips from the video are listed once more:
- Pay attention to your posture
- Stand with your feet apart and point your toes outward.
- Do not fidget nervously with your hands; keep your arms calmly by your sides or fold them across your chest.
- Keep your back and shoulders straight.
- Keep your chin up and make eye contact.
- Pay attention to your message
- Stay calm. Do not show that you are angry or sad.
- Speak loudly and clearly, and deliver a strong message from your own perspective. “Stop that! I don’t think this is okay.” Or: “I want you to stop doing that.”
- It is extremely good to stand up for yourself when you are being bullied. But standing up for yourself is not the only way to stop the bullying. Remember that you never have to solve it alone: seek help from friends, family or someone at school.