Every success counts

The plenary programme was opened by keynote speaker Patrick van Veen, a behavioural biologist. Participants were asked questions about their own sexual education, online behaviour and implementation of the theme Relationships and sexuality at school. Healthy School highlighted successes and expressed the wish to focus even more strongly on properly embedding the theme in schools over the next two years. Knowledge partners Rutgers, Stichting School en Veiligheid and Soa Aids Nederland gave participants a glimpse behind the scenes of various developments relating to the theme.

Between the speakers, there was a wonderful variety of practical and inspiring examples. These included the sanitary-pad dispenser at Graafschap College and additional efforts during Love Week at Gooise Praktijkschool. Mariëtte Hamer, government commissioner for sexually transgressive behaviour and sexual violence, had specially recorded a video message for everyone present.

During the conference, the Healthy School certificate was also presented to ZMLK De Zevenster. The school team explained that they were already doing a great deal in the area of relationship and sexuality education, which meant that taking the step towards obtaining the certificate happened more quickly.

Normalising conversations about relationships and sexuality

Three workshop rounds covered a wide range of topics: being yourself at school, sustained attention to relationships and sexuality, pleasure and consent, online behaviour, a safe school climate, culturally sensitive practice and much more. The aim was to encourage structural and sustainable attention to these issues in schools and to normalise conversations about them. Participants could also talk to various owners of Healthy School activities at the activities market.

Tips from the workshops

There was great enthusiasm for the extensive range of workshops during the conference. Some tips from the organisations that led the workshops:

  • Focusing on pleasure instead of risks is actually prevention: young people may, for example, start having sex later and, when they do, make informed choices. Be aware of your own norms and values regarding relationships and sexuality and set this ‘backpack’ aside so that you can be objective.
  • Sexuality is a learning process; we play a major role in the development of the sexual morality of pupils and students. The online world has a major influence on young people.
  • Involve parents and carers during peacetime. This means approaching them when things are going well, not only when a problem arises at school.
  • Establish clear frameworks regarding what constitutes desired and undesired behaviour at school.
  • Engage in conversation with pupils and students. They can indicate very well for themselves what should be discussed in education!
  • In special education, start as early as possible and work according to a continuous learning pathway.
  • Teach pupils and students to say ‘yes’, so that they also know when they should say ‘no’. From an early age, children are taught that they should set boundaries by saying, for example, ‘no, I don’t want this’. More importantly, however, is teaching children to express what they do want. They will then also know better what they do not want.
  • Do not underestimate the importance of sexuality education. Young apes imitate the behaviour of adults. Their ‘curriculum’ is everyday life. In humans, sexual behaviour mainly takes place behind closed doors. This makes sexuality education especially important.
  • Ask boys ‘difficult questions’. When you want to engage in conversation with boys, it helps when they realise that not everyone already knows everything about relationships and sexuality. Asking difficult questions makes this clear.

Healthy Relationships & Sexuality Incentive Scheme

This conference was organised as part of the Healthy School programme and specifically the Healthy Relationships & Sexuality Incentive Scheme. Schools that make use of the incentive scheme receive financial support, enabling them to devote (additional) attention to the theme of Relationships and sexuality. They also receive support and advice from a Healthy School adviser. Since the incentive scheme began in 2019, nearly 1,400 schools in primary education, special education, secondary education and vocational secondary education have already used the scheme.

Photo credit: Herbert Wiggerman.